Some days ago I had a discussion with H about change. For a while we´ve been thinking about moving to a new home, so let´s put it this way, the word “change” has popped up very often in our talks nowadays. As much as we love our tiny apartment, working and living in such a small space is becoming more and more challenging. At one point he told me “…yea, in some stuff you REALLY don´t like changes!”. For a moment his words felt quite startling. Hah…you think so?! “…are you kidding?” – he asked back. It got me thinking. He is right, in some things I don´t like it, however in others my reality looks very different.
If I think about my everyday whims, like using a specific art supply, preferring one ketchup brand over another or not wearing strong colors, yes it´s true, I usually don´t change. Also, I have a hard time re-arranging the furnitures in my apartment, getting used to a new computer or saying goodbye to a friend who moves away from the country. In this sense, I admit that I´m not the most easy-going person.
On the other hand, I´m living in a constant change. In one year my world turned upside down by choosing to pursue what I really love doing. Every day I´m working on things that I truly enjoy, I get to know more and more amazing, kind and talented people and I learn all the time! True enough, there are lots of bumps on the way, it´s not all pink clouds and rainbows. I make mistakes, I try to solve situations that first seem very scary and I definitely have my share of struggle when I communicate in Finnish. I cannot even count the times I made myself (and probably my clients, but they never show) laugh because of a little word mix-up. And needless to mention all the costs of running the business that I must be able to cover. It´s a bittersweet feeling when you get a mail from your bookkeeper, saying “Yay, you did well in the last three months! You have to pay X euro taxes! Congrats!” Here comes the first heart-attack. “…and you´ll also need to pay advance taxes every month from now on…” And then the second heart attack. Yes, I´m supposed to be happy about paying my taxes! When I told about this to my Father-in-law, he just smiled and said “Welcome to the Finnish world of entrepreneurship!”
No misunderstanding, I´m not complaining. I just think that this is the part of the change, stepping out of the comfort-zone. I´m often finding myself thinking about work-stuff when I´m supposed to relax. If I get sick, there´s no-one to cover me to do the work. For sure, the way the 168h in the week looks now is totally different compared to how it was 2-3 years ago. Sometimes it´s hard and demanding, even if it´s just a small, one-person start-up company. But it´s also so exciting and fulfilling! When you feel enthusiastic, you feel like you have a reason to work. It´s a constant positive boost and I think it has an effect on every aspect of life.
I think change is good in many things, as long as it makes you happy and content. Then it´s a great adventure, even if it´s filled with rocky moments.
It´s September, one more change to the year. The day before yesterday, for the first time I felt the chilly “Autumn air” during an evening walk. I adore this month for so many reasons, yet I feel like I could still enjoy the long Summer days for a while. Now it´s time to do the finishing touches to wedding photos from the Summer, sending them to the newlyweds, it´s time to get the Winter invitations printed and prepare for the next season. I have so much to share here on the blog: photos, styled shoot experience, new designs, upcoming events etc. So more to follow!
I realise this post is somewhat different compared to the previous ones here. But maybe every once in a while I can write about more personal topics as well…
…for a change. 😉